Dating your partner after having children.

01 March Ayesha Farhad 28 Comments


We all have come to terms with the fact that parenting is a full time job and there is literally no tracing your steps back. What people do not realise is that, it is perfectly normal to crave freedom and trying to get out for a while and there is absolutely no shame in trying to spice things up with your partner. Parents literally have zero time on their hands to actually get work done so let alone trying to fit in a quick date with your significant other.

So after the days work and with the kids asleep, all you want to do is get under the duvet and dose off as soon as your close your eyes. But we often forget that it is important to give each other your time and relax so maintain a healthy relationship and a general happy atmosphere in the house.

My husband and I haven't gone on a date in AGES. I can not even remember the last time we went to the cinema to watch a movie together. But we do take out time for doing little things that is just our alone time and get more comfortable in each others lives.

1. Breakfast dates.

I know, I know that breakfast is a rushed situation in most households but it literally is the most important meal and time that your spend with your family. My husband usually drops my son to school and then goes off to work. But every once in a while, he will go in late just to take me out for breakfast. We drop our little man to school and then go to a nearby cafe to catch a quick breakfast. It is literally the only time, I am not worrying about my son spilling tea all over. So once your child(ren) are in school, go on and grab a quick breakfast together!

2. Family help/Baby sitter.

So this one is a little tricky. I do not have any family here  in London and I am generally very very scared to get a babysitter so this one does not apply to me! But I am quiet excited for family to come visit me here so my husband and I can sneak out for a date night with nothing to worry about. But if you have family around and you are more comfortable with the idea of hiring a baby sitter, then seriously, what is stopping you from occasionally going out on a date? Dress up and have fun! 

3. Movie Nights.

I love love love movie nights with the husband! I seriously look forward to them every single week! We sometimes have them twice a week and it is just the most favourite time of the week for me! Since we can not go out to the cinema, we bring the cinema home! I plan ahead for movie nights. So I skip nap time for my son during the day and he goes to bed early after dinner. The husband and I have ample time to finish a movie, snack on literally everything and generally have fun! Sometimes we watch an old Indian movie or we stream a new movie that has hit the charts! Switch off all the lights and have some popcorn, tortilla chips, soda and lots of sweets to munch on!

4. Family dates.

I love family dates! And we literally have the best time ever! If your child is a bit older, then you can go bowling as a family. Maybe go to the zoo on a sunny day and make a picnic out of it! Even if you don't want to go out and want to stay in the house, make a small picnic in the backyard! Put in some activities like water balloons, paint fights, a small cricket or football match will just do the trick and bring you way closer in as a family. And the laughing fits that escalate after, are the best thing ever!

5. Child friendly restaurants.

Skip the regular dinner nights that end up in burger joints or pizza places. Look for fine dining options that have a child friendly atmosphere. A lot of restaurants are combining fine dining with being child friendly. And I seriously can not thank them enough. As much as we love our kids, we do love going out and indulging in good food without worrying about other people harassing us about bringing our kids for fine dining. Feed your kid from home if they are a bit too small to eat themselves. So you do not have to worry about feeding them and then focusing on your food. Happy tummies also lead to a joyful time, in my case.

These are some of the ideas that you can use to rekindle the love in your relationship. To experience a healthy relationship is very very important to create a general happy atmosphere in the house. The children witness love and etch it in their memory and they grow up respecting their own relationships. If you have a bit of saving, then you can also go for a staycation as a family. The children can relax with the activities and you do not have to worry about the stress of always hawking them out.

28 comments:

  1. I agree, date nights with husband are very rare after becoming parents. Even I don't have any family here and I do not like the idea of leaving my son with a baby sitter.

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    1. Same here! after hearing SO many horror stories about baby sitters, I am just really put off!

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  2. It's important to spend time with your partner and nurture your relationship, so these are great ideas for finding ways to be able to find that time even after having kids. I think your breakfast dates after dropping your son off at school are a great idea!

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  3. Brilliant idea! We have become fairly lax in ten years of marriage and sometimes our only date night is when we hire a sitter for Parent's evening! On saying that we enjoy our cosy nights in a lot. Good post!

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  4. I would think that movie nights would be the best thing

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  5. haha i had to giggle at the bit after children , were parents to 8 and homeschool and work so we never get a breath between us even at night at bedtime , it really does get to you sometimes and we all need adult time even if it does mean sending them to bed early , getting the teenager to look after little one for an hour while you just sit and even eat a meal together and chat for a hour or two together x

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    1. Oh wow! Must be a full house! I agree! And dont ever feel guilty about sending them to bed a bit early so you can have some alone time! Its the best ever!

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  6. These are great ideas! We rarely ever go on 'dates' anymore, and I am totally with you on the babysitter thing! Love the idea of a breakfast date though!

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  7. I agree, it is so important to keep 'dating' and getting to know your partner even when you do have kids to keep the spark alive. What a beautiful bond you two have. By the way I love Indian films! Do you have a fave?

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    1. I was raised while watching Indian movies, me being a south asian obviously! LOVE old school ones though! Khabhie Khushi khabhie ghum is my favourite! Whats yours?

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  8. Movie nights do sound fantastic and really fun too. Thanks for sharing x

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  9. I think it's so important to still date after you have kids and do things together x

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  10. Great post, it's so important to spend time as a couple as well as a family :)

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  11. It's so hard to get alone time together isn't it? I wish my husband didn't have to rush off so we could have a leisurely breakfast that would be so nice.

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  12. It's so important to keep the romance alive after children. I'm lucky I have lots of family on hand willing to babysit our bubba so we can go out for some us time x

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  13. I love spending time with my husband and movie nights together are definitely high on the list. And although we love all having dinner as a family, we try once a week to save our meal until after they've gone to bed so that we can enjoy something akin to date night!

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  14. I can relate to this, as we have a 15 week old daughter. We had our first date night last weekend and it was much needed.

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  15. I don't have kids but my parents date once in a while and I learnt that it actually keeps their relationship very healthy. Once I get kids of my own, I sure will follow all these steps.

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  16. I love the breakfast date idea! We do this when my husband has a day off but that's literally like twice a year!!

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  17. Good for you! I feel like it's so important for couples to always remember to give each other love and attention whenever possible. These are great ideas!

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  18. I'll pass this along to my friends with children:-)

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  19. I dont have kids but we both have busy working lives and both blog, so making time for one another is hugely important x

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  20. For couples who have kids this is definitely great advice! Can't beat a movie night

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  21. I always love movies nights so when I have kids, a long time in the future a way, they will not stop!

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  22. I don't really get date nights since having my three unless they come with us. Movie nights are good as it's nice for us all to snuggle and watch tv.

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  23. I love your tips and I wish I'd tried some of these when my twins were small. Certainly all my focus was on them and not my relationship x

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  24. Great ideas, its important to keep the relationship fresh when you have a baby x

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  25. Although I don't have children myself, these are some great tips in general too. :)

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